Went for a run this morning!
WAIT. Before you scroll by thinking this is going to be a humble brag post about how fit and sporty I am, please realize it is not that in any way.
It cannot be that because I am actually not those things at all. In fact, I am a terrible runner. My “running” pace is not much faster than some people’s walking pace. I have never been athletic. Like ever. Unless you count that one time I played freshmen field hockey in high school. But everyone made the team. And I got cut the following year. So, no, that doesn’t count.
“Are your ears on?” I asked.
“Yes!” She answered happily, as she made a clicking sound with her mouth and moved her hands as if she were making sure her “listening ears” were securely in place.
“I have something very important to tell you. Are you ready?”